The Dock of the Bay

Visitors to San Francisco who find themselves wearying after a day of sightseeing and doing what ten people tell them to do, should head down to the Bay. Here, hidden among the various tourist attractions and gentrified wharves, they will find a simple dock.

Admission to the Dock of the Bay is strictly limited to one solitary person, and the price has remained the same for over 40 years.

There are several activities available to the tourist visiting the Dock. These include:

·         Sitting in the morning sun

·         Watching the ships roll in

·         Watching them roll away again

·         Watching the tide roll away

·         Resting your bones

·         Wasting time

Although the visit seems relaxing at first, the atmosphere has been subtly constructed to evoke feelings of melancholy. We advise the visitor to limit his time here, or risk falling into a mood of regret, and soon discover that their loneliness won’t leave them alone. Whistling, normally considered an uplifting diversion, won’t help.

Because this has proven a popular destination, many people have attempted to reconstruct the experience by building their own docks. Some have even tried to make this an uplifting experience. Do not be fooled by imitations.

This dock has been completely white-washed, 

and features live ducks, for some reason.